Top Five Reasons Fat People Hate: Beach Chairs

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1). When you are used to having that fat ass flap in the wind like old glory its hard to quick sub out that 350 lb.  O-lineman you have hiding in your pants fast enough to wedge yo ass into the chair.

2). Because everyone that’s watching this shit pop off knows that there isn’t any titanium (naturally occurring or man made) that can save that chair from gettin it wheels taken out from under it.

3). Sitting in regular human-chairs already make u look mammoth and make your pants ride up in your crotch , now all this has to be attempted in damn a spandex swimsuit.

4). Your at the beach hot, sweaty, stanky and hungry and the friction between u, the chair and the sand is causing the sand to turn into shards of glass. This shit continues to cut your ass until you start bleeding marsh mellow spread.

5). Getting out that bitch w/o it being hooked on yo booty.