2008 Man of the Year

It is finally here.  The world has been waiting for the 2008 TFPH Man of the Year which may be the most prestigious honor that we bestow on an individual.  My vote is tallied and here are the nominees.

1. Charles Barkley-  The Chuckster ended the year strong.   Not only does he give us a reason to stay up and watch Clipper games but he is also giving back to society.  Despite the poor economy he was still willing to hire a young lady at 3 in the morning.  How many new jobs did you create in 2009?  That is what I thought.
2. Barack Obama – Obama was named Time Magazine Person of the Year and becomes the first black President since William Mckinley.  He also inspired a Young Jeezy song that I cannot get out of my head.
3. World’s Fattest Man – Manuel Uribe dropped 700lbs and got married.  He also introduced us to the term sex ramp which conjures up images of Evil Knievel and the porn industry.  The only drawback is the profit margin from  Taco Bell declined 70% in direct correlation with his weight loss.
4. Artie Lange – 2008 was a tremendous roller coaster ride for Artie Lange.  He is the only reason to listen to the Stern show and became a best selling author with Too Fat to Fish.  The only thing slowing him down are cupcakes and heroin.

And the 2008 TFPH Man of the Year goes to….

Artie Lange.  Nobody is more entertaining on the late night talk shows than that baby gorilla.  He is a fifth of Jack Daniels away from sweeping the Trainwreck of the Year category (Click Here) but he managed to hold things together.  Let’s be thankful that they have not developed a cheese flavored heroin.  Here is Artie on Jimmy Kimmel.

2008 Marriage Proposal of the Year

I have attended thousands of sporting events over the years.  I will a accept the over priced tickets, $20 parking and the fact that the 12oz beer that I downed out of the wax cup cost me $9.   The one thing that I will not accept is the douchebag that uses a break in action to propose to his girlfriend.  It was original the first time.  We do not need you to profess your love during a 20 second time out.

The 2008 Marriage Proposal of the Year will hopefully put an end to this trend.   I love how the girl rejects this clown like she’s Akeem Olajawon in his prime.  I’m guessing she dis not want her marriage proposal to come with the stench of Dikembe Mutombo in the air.  Let this be a lesson.  Leave me out of your marriage proposals and you will not have Tracy McGrady laughing at you or have to be consoled by the team mascot.

2008 TV Show of the Year

Back to our 2008 Year End Awards.  We have already awarded the 2008 Cooking Show of the Year and I am not going to give you the TV Show of the Year.  I would like to welcome anybody without basic cable to a new world.  There is more to television programming than CSI on every network.  I can assure you that you will not see an autopsy on any of the 2008 nominees.

1. The Wire – Many of you do not understand the ghetto which means that this show may confuse you.  I have found that the ghetto drug dealers beat the big city crack prices.  The Wire allows you to converse with the “shot callas”  without sounding like you are from the suburbs.  This is HBO’s best show period.
2. The Shield – This is by far my favorite cop show.  Where else can you see a 5′2 bald tough guy regulating the streets of LA.  The Shield writers tossed the scripted cop show format and gave you something unique for 7 years.  Hard to believe this was on cable and not HBO.
3. Buona Dominca – America gives us Rosie O’Donnell variety shows (Click here) while Italy gives us Sara Varone.  I do not speak Italian so I have no idea what the hell they are talking about but the beauty of the show is that you do not need to know what the hell they are saying.
4. Always Sunny in Philadelphia – The best comedy show on TV by far.  Do not let the word Philadelphia in the title discourage you.  Yes it is about losers and yes the people are terrible but it works.  If you are not watching this, you deserve another decade of Friends.

And the winner is……
Buona Dominca.  This was a tough call.  I love all of these shows but Sara Varone makes this Youtube friendly.  Here is a nice clip of her on a surfboard machine and tiny dress.  The NBC equivalent would be Rosie on a forklift.  This why Italy is light years ahead of us.  Enjoy.