Archive for the diet Category

Lindsay Lohan Diet

Posted in diet, Entertainment Section with tags , , , on October 4, 2009 by Straight Cash Homey

lookingbeatungaro

Quick disclaimer.  I am not a doctor, nutritionist, or dietitian.  However, I am able to recognize that something is not working for you Lindsay.  You are 23 years old and look like a 95 year old Sharon Stone.  How could this happen?  You are not working 60 hours a week at a coal mine.  You are not working at the Bunny Ranch.  You pretty much are not working period.  How could you reverse Benjamin Button it so quickly?

Let’s take a look at this.  I’m going to start with the Red Bull & Vodka which keeps your heart racing and your brain alert to enjoy more Red Bull & Vodka.  The cycle just never stops.  Replace that with water and get some sleep.  Next, cocaine should only be used for special occasions like the weekend.  Finally, switch from Marlboro to Marlboro Lites and only smoke them after 9am.  Again, there is nothing wrong with aging.  It is a natural human process.  However, Lindsay Lohan should not receive the senior citizen discount every time she eats at Denny’s.  Enough of the Golden Girls look.