Archive for the Music Industry Category

Supersized Simpson

Posted in Music Industry with tags , , , , , , , , on January 26, 2009 by Straight Cash Homey

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Wow.  While Tony Romo is choking playoff games, his girl is choking down Big Macs.  That person in the picture above is not Meatloaf.  That is the girl who ruined the Cowboys season with a little help from her douchebag boyfriend.  I do not know where to start on this one.  First, people will not notice your giant tits when you have a beer gut bigger than a dude that installs mufflers.   Second, why in the hell are you wearing two belts?  Those granny elastic waisted pants are going nowhere.  Two belts are a bit much.  You are dating the QB of America’s Team not Jared.  Get yourself together.  Talk to Kige Ramsey about catching Anorexic.  (Click Here)

I’m not trying to be mean.  I hated the no talent retard when she was skinny.  This is a wake up call for you Romo.   If this does not make you leave that idiot to concentrate on winning a freaking playoff game, then I don’t know what will.  Do the right thing.

Joaquin Phoenix Rapping

Posted in Music Industry with tags , , , , , , , , on January 19, 2009 by Straight Cash Homey

I’m not sure if this was the dream that Martin Luther King talked about 45 years ago.  Joaquin Phoenix has pretty much lost it and is now a rapper.  He looks like he is channeling Jim Morrison and Rufus the Stunt Bum from Bumfights.  I’m going to give him and any of you other aspiring rappers some free advice.  If you were cast as Johnny Cash who is as white as they come, you are not suited for the rap world.    You are a great actor but please leave the rapping to guys like Kevin Federline.  Just stop walking the line with your right nostril and we will forget about this.  Thank you.

Mo Money Mo Problems

Posted in Music Industry with tags , , , , , , , , on January 19, 2009 by Straight Cash Homey

The man was scared to death not to let him take today off.  I plan on enjoying the holiday by catching Notorious.  For those of you not in the rap scene, this movie is about Notorious B.I.G aka Biggie aka Biggie Smalls aka Christopher Wallace.  This is actually getting good reviews despite the fact that PDiddy is involved.  Word of advice for my suburban white readers.  If you are scared to go, stay at home.  If it is not showing in your neighborhood movie theater then just wait until it comes out on dvd excuse me blu ray (Did not mean to disrespect).  I was able to score a clip of the movie.  After watching this, I think I need 17 shells so I make it understood.   Watch and you’ll understand.

Slash and Chinese Democracy

Posted in Music Industry with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 21, 2008 by Straight Cash Homey

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I know this is a bit late but after the success of my Holiday Movie Review, I have decided to review the new Guns N Roses CD.  The first thing that comes to mind is that it is not the same without Slash.  I never could get by the fact that Slash is not on guitar.  As you can see from the picture above, the rock n roll lifestyle was rough on him.  Slash danced way too long with Mr. Brownstone and he looks like hell.  Just look at the guy.  It is sad.  Without Slash, Chinese Democracy is not Guns N Roses.  I listened to a few tracks and was not get hooked.  I never felt like I was in the jungle and sometimes felt like I was gonna die.  It was more of a solo album that lacked the edge that was GNR.  Pretty Average.

El Paso 911

Posted in Music Industry, Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , on December 13, 2008 by Straight Cash Homey

I roll in the suburbs and we do not have much of a gang problem outside of those 14 year old skateboarders in the Office Max parking lot that sometimes cause quite  the ruckus.  But there is no longer a need to worry.  The El Paso PD has produced a fine PSA that will end gangbanging.  Everybody knows the best way to reach these boyz in the hood is through rap music.  Throw in a white cop rapping for added street appeal and problem solved.  Lets see.  Cops, White Rappers, Old People and an uncomfortable lynching scene.  What could go wrong?  Thanks to totallycrap.com for finding this gem.

Tuba Players

Posted in Music Industry with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 3, 2008 by Straight Cash Homey

The marching band is not known for their athletic ability and social skills.  You probably remember them as the dorky kids who were ostracized into their own little community.  Every now and again, they will come out of hiding and give us pure video gold.  This is what you get when you add fat tuba players, puddles of water and a football field.  Enjoy the pageantry of the Florida State Marching Band.