Archive for Football

Collinsworth likes them young

Posted in Douchebags with tags , , , , , , , , , on September 12, 2009 by Straight Cash Homey

Great piece of journalism here.  Terre Blair explores the myth that millionaire professional athletes do better with the ladies than your average factory worker.  Guess what?  They do.  I’m glad that mystery is solved.

Cris Collinsworth probably wants this one back.  He shares of technique of walking around with 100 dollar bills in his pocket and also talks about the high school girls.  It sounds like his 100 bill trick only works with girls ages 14-18 until they figure it out around their freshman year of college.  Now that he is replacing Madden.  Do you think we may have a new Collinsworth Cruiser?  Just a nice yellow school bus should do the trick.

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Tila Tequila: A shake at love

Posted in Police Beat with tags , , , , , , , , , on September 11, 2009 by Straight Cash Homey

Tila

If your friend decides to drink and drive, just take their keys.  Shawn Merriman might have been a bit overzealous in his actions.  Tila did not want to join Merriman and his two other girlfriends in private.  She simply took off her clothes and decided to leave.  Nothing wrong with that.  Merriman concerned for her safety went after her like she was Brady Quinn.  (By the way Browns, nobody cares which crappy qb you are starting.  They will still throw 3 interceptions a game and you will go 5-11.  Enough with the big mystery.) It appears that he grabbed her by the arms and shook her until she sobered up a bit.  Not sure if he threw in his stupid lights out dance but he did not appear to hurt her.  He may be forced to only date two women at a time instead of three once this gets out there.   Now the San Diego DA is saying that there are no charges to be filed.  Merriman will probably have to dip into his wallet and this will all go away.  Just like his career if he gets busted for roids again and her career once she hits 25.

Alabama Fan Loses It

Posted in Douchebags with tags , , , , , , , , , , on September 10, 2009 by Straight Cash Homey

College Football is back and what better way then to highlight the nice fan base from Alabama.  I’ll admit that I knew this was not going to be pretty when I received this link that simply stated Bama Fan.  Sure enough the jackass made a fool of himself with his pom poms and surprisingly without the aid of Jack Daniels.  Something tells me had a similar reaction during Obama’s speech last night.  This was game one.  Enjoy the season and learn how to swing a folding chair like a man.

Brenda Warner

Posted in Sports with tags , , , , , , on January 25, 2009 by Straight Cash Homey

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When did this happen?  Like every other football fan, I have not watched any Arizona Cardinals football.  The last time I saw Brenda Warner was during the 2001 Superbowl.  She looked like an older version of Detlef Schrempf.  Now she’s stopped going to Kurt’s barber and looks like she may have busted out with some implants.  She’s also doing what I recommend for any average to below average girl.  Find a big woman and put her in a tank top.  Then make her go wherever you go.  Please have the common decency of letting her ride in the car with you.  It looks bad to have your QB husband force her in the trunk.

Take Note Romo

Posted in Sports with tags , , , , , , , , , , on December 29, 2008 by Straight Cash Homey

I am really too pissed off to deal with anything tonight and would rather quit just like the Cowboys.  However, I am not a loser.  I brought in Youtube Sports Demonstration sensation Kige Ramsey to show Tony Romo how to properly play quarterback.   Kige actually grips the ball without fumbling it on the ground.  He then drops back and throws it a good 7 yards downfield.  You do not see Ed Reed or some Philly scrub running with the ball the other way while he looks at the camera.  Kige does not one hop a two yard out on 3rd and 1.  He just drops back and throws the ball properly.  It is not that hard Romo.

Comments are closed to all female St. Louis Rams fans and Al-Qaeda members.

Tuba Players

Posted in Music Industry with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , on December 3, 2008 by Straight Cash Homey

The marching band is not known for their athletic ability and social skills.  You probably remember them as the dorky kids who were ostracized into their own little community.  Every now and again, they will come out of hiding and give us pure video gold.  This is what you get when you add fat tuba players, puddles of water and a football field.  Enjoy the pageantry of the Florida State Marching Band.

Texas Tech Post Game Celebration

Posted in Sports with tags , , , , , , , on November 3, 2008 by Straight Cash Homey

A little post game celebrating and grave dancing.